I would like to share with you a couple of actual questions that were on the last quiz I took in my Abnormal Psychology class. (These are all verbatim!)
10. According to the text, you are more likely to develop an anxiety disorder if:
a. You are female
b. You are male
c. You are below the age of 11
d. You are a flaming, gaping ass hole
15. If you believe Generalized Anxiety Disorder is due to a universal fear of the limits and responsibilities of one's existence, you are most likely:
a. A cognitive-behaviorist
b. A sissy
c. A humanist
d. An existentialist
16. When your therapist helps you to overcome a phobia by actually doing the thing that you most fear (i.e. handling a snake, or letting a spider crawl across her arm, etc.) she is using the behavioral method of:
a. Showing you what a freakin wimp, whiner, girly man you are
b. Flooding
c. Modeling
d. Systematic frightening to death
17. If your therapist wants you to get over your anxiety and fear of heights by looking out the window of the 100th floor of a building until the anxiety dissipates, she:
a. Ain't talkin to my ass!
b. Is using the technique of flooding
c. Is using the technique of modeling
d. Wants to see a grown man soil his undies and then be reduced to a sniveling pile of jelly because she is a man-hating feminist turbo-diesel dyke
18. If you swallow all the anti-psychotic, anti-anxiety, and anti-depression drugs in the world at the same time:
a. You will gain five pounds and look like a great fat beached whale
b. You will develop immunity to psychosis, anxiety and depression but it won't matter you brainless dipwad because you will...not be only merely dead, but really most sincerely dead (from the Wizard of Oz, in case you wondered or didn't already know)
c. Why the hell would you wanna do that? Yeeeeesh, what a schmuck you must be!
d. Please mark "d" for this question on the bubble sheet, or you will get it wrong. And once again I accept your gratitude for yet another freebie five-pointer. You owe me, big time.
20. If you had made up this question, you would:
a. Attach a twenty dollar bill to the answer sheet when you turn it in.
(this was the only answer listed for this question.)
And that is for real. College sucks a lot of dick sometimes, but once in a while you get a teacher like Dr. Wilson who doesn't take things so seriously. Don't get the impression that he's a total putz -- he is an awesome teacher, and I have learned a lot from him in the two semesters that I have had him. He just has an awesome sense of humor and once in a while he cuts us a break when he knows we have been going over some really hard material.
In short, Dr. Wilson is the balls.
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1 comment:
That is freakin' awesome. I am gonna post your blog everywhere now ok.
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